go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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