I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Randomize
