Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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