i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
