last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
