Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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