Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records