If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
