you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize