How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize
