Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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