and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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