I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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