I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Randomize
