we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
