you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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