I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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