belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
