Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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