Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

seriously i just wanna be friends

(1-508): View more from Massachusetts

pass

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(404): View more from Georgia

He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying

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(845): View more from New York

i can't find my house

(1-845): View more from New York

we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.

(845): View more from New York

i'm pretty sure my house moved.

Fav 51 14290 1960
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(702): View more from Nevada

I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.

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(660): View more from Missouri

Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me

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(251): View more from Alabama

Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.

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(313): View more from Michigan

I've been vomiting all day.

(248): View more from Michigan

All day? It's 10am.

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