Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
