its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
