Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
