I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
