So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
