Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
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