i think my mom watched the whole time
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I would fuck him just for his dog
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
