I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You're a waste of cheezeits
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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