I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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