16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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