I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
