More tranny stories later!
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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