when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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