Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
