New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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