I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Randomize
