you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
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Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
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Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.