U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
