Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize