Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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