Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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