just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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