loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
So many bounce houses so little time
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
