I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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