OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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