id be glad to
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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