all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize