Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
they're like a gay fantastic four
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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