WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
