I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Drake has all the answers
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Randomize
